Jaflong, Crookes, Sheffield (62%)

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Tuesday 26th July 2016.

Now look here, these could well be the finest Indian restaurant toilets in Sheffield. Worthy of national consideration – if they do a national prize for restaurant toilets. I’m not saying they beat The British Oak out in Mosborough of course. Those are very special. Nevertheless, Jaflong’s are up there: Clean, bright, swanky. Maybe a little bit too sleek and ‘Miami Lap Dance Club’ for my taste. (Don Johnson under the toilet seat, if you know what I mean.) But perfect for the chinos and bandana set.

Tuesday night and it’s pretty dead. Jase likened the place to a used car showroom with its plain, unhindered space and glazed facade – can just picture a fleet of Ford Capris. The tables are crammed in with canteen-style formality, smothered in white table linen. Could perhaps do with some definition here and there: booth seating, a pot plant winding up some trellis work, that kind of thing.

You guessed it – Limeless in Gaza. Instead, the standard sub, a red chilli jamish concoction. On the whole, generous renditions of familiar pickle tray ditties. Onion bhajis – better than average: crispily coated, juicy and onionful – packing a punch. Tried the aloo chop for a change – we both enjoyed those too: mashed potato melts with an eggy, aromatic finish.

Sadly, the main dishes suffered a class divide of Victorian proportions. Jase’s naga lamb a tip-top, richly spiced success story – a Little Lord Fauntleroy. My duck baruchi more like a Grub Street whodunnit. Curiously, twice the size of the naga lamb dish; duck fat clinging in chewy slabs to each meaty morsel. The signature crispy onions tired and bedraggled. In fact, completely lacking the comforting properties of a classic baruchi. Draught Cobra fortified eye witnesses at the crime scene.

We finished on a Calypso coffee, a bit on the bland side. A tepid wipe from the packet. At £60 all in, fairly pricy. Still, as Humphrey Bogart used to say, “We’ll always have the lavies”.

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Attendees:
Judge ‘Gonzo’ Pickles
Jason Paine

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2 comments

  1. Jason Paine · · Reply

    So it was another foray up to my old stomping ground of Crookes for a visit to Jaflong.

    It’s a different beast these days, a move in the last couple of years from the cramped, atmospheric premises at the bottom of Crookes to an old video shop large enough to resemble a car showroom.

    Now to the food, all in all a decent effort. The stand out for me was my Meat Naga, a hot, tasty dish bursting with flavour. The name inspired thoughts of another hottie, Naga Munchetty, oh Naga.

    Moving on to the drinks, Cobra on draught so we were happy there but the Irish Coffees although looking the part tasted like they had half a teaspoon of Gold Blend in them.

    This was a shame and they could have saved the day for Pickles although he was partly compensated by the toilets which were highly impressive.

    The not so hot facial and melting after eight mints would have been better left out as would the relatively high prices.

    If Naga is there I’ll certainly be back, she’s got early starts though so not much chance of that…

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  2. […]           New Jawed, Rue de Longchamp, Paris Toilets:                           Jaflong, Crookes, Sheffield Ambience:                    The Valley Junction 397, Jesmond, Newcastle Gulab Jamun:   […]

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